By Bongi Hill
Babywearing is trending all over these days but it’s been around for centuries. I am Xhosa and grew up in the Eastern Cape in Mthatha where it's very common and ordinary to carry your children. Ukubeleka as babywearing is called in Xhosa, is central to our way of caring for our children and life in general. I learnt to carry babies on my back using a towel or thin blanket when I was a child. I carried younger family members before I was a parent myself being taught by mother and grandmother. Carrying my children in view of this history goes beyond our connection, it connects us to our greater community.
Babywearing is one of my top parenting tools because it helps me so much. I started babywearing Lukhanyo from the day we came home from the hospital. Lukhanyo was one of those babies that slept best and was most content when he was held. If I tried to put him down, he’d be up in exactly 32 minutes. When carried, he was able to sleep for hours. As a toddler, babywearing helps with soothing his big emotions (read: tantrums) and carrying him when his little legs get tired. At 3.5 years old he is still the cuddliest child ever.
I started babywearing Esona within an hour of meeting her. It has been amazing for bonding with her and has helped us to form a secure attachment. It has been a lifesaver for parenting a toddler and a baby, I simply couldn’t survive without it. Babywearing gives me so much confidence and freedom as a parent. I love being able to go hiking, have coffee with friends and travel knowing that my baby is secure and content. I’m very passionate about spreading the love for babywearing and helping other parents in their babywearing journeys.
Babywearing is an amazing tool for parents with many benefits for baby and the parent.
Here are my top 5 tips for babywearing:
1. SAFETY FIRST As with any product, there are safety guidelines to keep in mind. It is important to make sure your child's airway remains open at all times while babywearing. The best way is to keep them in an upright position, high enough to be able to monitor their breathing and to ensure that their chin is off the chest. It is also important your carrier provides adequate support for your infant's developing neck and spine. You also need to ensure that your carrier or wrap is tightly secured to ensure that your child does not fall out. Ideally, babies should be carried with their knees higher than the bottom in a spread squat position with support from knee to knee. In older babies and toddlers full knee to knee support is not necessary once they can bear weight on their legs and not always possible. Always check your carrier for any wear and tear or damage before use. Practise all carries especially back carries with a spotter, over a bed or low to the ground until you are confident. Avoid babywearing in situations where it would not be safe to carry an infant in your arms such as when cycling or riding a horse. The safety tips are best summarised by the TICKS pneumonic: T-Tight I-In view at all times
C- Close enough to kiss
K- Keep in view at all times
S- Supported back
2. TRY BEFORE YOU BUY
There are many different types of carriers and some you might not even know exist. They range from soft structured buckle carriers, ring slings, stretchy wraps, woven wraps, onbhuminos and meh dais. There is no such thing as ‘the best carrier’, even that popular brand that everyone seems to loves. The best carrier is the one which works best for you and your child. It’s the one that best meets your individual needs. Not all carriers fit the same. The fit and comfort can also be affected by your specific body shape. If you can, I recommend you try on a few different types of carriers and brands before you buy. In South Africa we have lending libraries in most major cities where you can try on a variety of carriers and have a consultation with a more experienced babywearer to help you figure out what works best for you. Join Nino Babywearing South Africa on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/ninosa/ to find a lending library in your area. 3. BUY PRE-LOVED Buying carriers second hand is perfectly fine. Ensure that you check the carrier for any damage before buying. Check the buckles and stitching. Some carriers like woven wraps and ring slings are even better when they are pre-loved because they are sometimes broken-in and soft therefore easier to use. You can find preloved carriers on the following Facebook Groups: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1594869624076520/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/1627629740790519/
4. PRACTICE AND TROUBLESHOOT If you have already bought a carrier, wrap or sling but you’re struggling to get a comfortable fit or baby seems unhappy in the carrier, don’t give up before giving it a proper chance. Start off by reading the instructions and watching demo videos to make sure you’re using the carrier correctly and getting the best fit. Always makes sure baby is fed and has a clean nappy before placing them in the carrier. Keep in mind that babies pick up your anxiety, so if you're feeling nervous it can make them agitated too. Keep practicing, your confidence will grow. Breastfed babies might get fussy when they are close to the boobies even when you've just fed them. Give them a top up feed before placing them in the carrier. Once you've got the babywearing basics down, learning to breastfeed in the carrier will be a game changer. There are a lot of demo videos on YouTube and most brands have videos on their website or social media pages. If all of that doesn’t help, ask someone with experience to help you with troubleshooting in person or online. I'm always happy to help so feel free to contact me.
5. MOVE, TALK, SING & DANCE
If baby seems unhappy in the carrier, especially when they are awake try moving(walking or bopping) and talking to them. Babies find motion and the sound of your voice comforting. If that doesn't work sing to them and dance, baby will love it. If you and baby are new babywearing it will take a bit of time for both of you to get used to it. Be patient and don't give up. I hope that helps to give to you a safe, comfortable and enjoyable baby-wearing journey.
Babywearing|Parenting|Life
🌿Hi,I’m Bongi Hill 🌿#Gentleparenting Mama of 2👦🏽👶🏾 🌿Learning through play | Travel & Wine ❤️ Ecofriendly Life 🌿#Farmlife in Tulbagh🇿🇦 🌿Paeds Doc
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