We always knew it would be IUI when we decided to start a family given my partner is older and has had a vasectomy, but heading into our second round of IUI, I have been totally caught off guard about how quickly the decision to try for a baby has taken a turn from happily sharing the news that we were starting the process, into a frankly obsessive mania of epic highs and the lowest lows. Nothing can prepare you for that dreaded two week wait before a result, and I now realise there is just so much I didn't know before we started, like the fact that the window in which you can fall pregnant each month is actually really small or that bleeding in early pregnancy is quite common (making you hold out with extra false hope that you are indeed pregnant when you know deep down that all those PMS symptoms you frantically Google to see they could point to early pregnancy are just that, good old PMS). Now I am starting to regret the 5 pregnancy books I bought to 'be prepared' staring me down from the book shelf, and that free second hand cot we accepted that stands empty in the corner of the lounge.
That said it is early days - really keen to hear from other on this journey about their experiences...how have you handled it, and how do you stop from losing yourself and your partner in the process?
I feel your pain and anguish and I am sending lots of love. Our journey has been over 6 years now which have included 4 losses. We are now currently getting guidance at Cape Fertility. Truth? I have not handled it well. I still emotional breakdowns and we end up having horrible fights. Our marriage has taken a toll. But, we are still here and still love each other very much. What helped me? Running. I became an active runner and it really helps my depression and helps me be positive. I too have those pregnancy books! And what have I learnt? Put them away. And do not Google. Just have faith (something I still tell myself). Good luck xxxx
Good golly, I have been there and got the T-shirt, shorts and even underwear. I remember those days, going through the motions of starting your period, going in on day 3, having to take medication or an injection, then going back for hubby to make his donation and then for the doctor to inseminate. It's all very exciting and nerve wracking all at the same time. It's a roller coaster of emotions. We did four rounds of IUI before we were told to do IVF. I wish I could say "Try not to think about it" but when wanting a baby with the person you love, it's hard for it to not be all consuming, to be on your mind every second of the day. All I can say is take time for yourself, a spa day or even meditation. I even went and started acupuncture after each session. Also communication is key, talk to your partner and I can even suggest joining a group on Facebook. I did and having other women to chat to helped me a lot. Sending lots of love and light.
Gosh I know exactly what you going through... I went through fertility with my first born! It was the hardest time because I remember my doc told me I had a 20% chance everytime we did treatment, as opposed to my 8% chance. And the worst is that you have so much hope that it could be the time, and then suddenly you get your period and your world comes crushing down! I fell pregnant... so I want to say... IT will happen! But, I can't say it was an easy road for me emotionally. I'm a control freak, so I wanted to control everything and I felt so out of control. But, I learnt that the more I stressed the less chance. Because after I had Kayla (my first born) we didn't go on contraceptive because we knew we would need treatment again. Docs confirmed this. And then I fell pregnant naturally🤭 six months after having Kayla (was so shocked) but I think it was also because I wasnt stressing. So don't forget to look after yourself to try not drive yourself crazy. And then in that small window - go on a date night, make a fun day/ evening😂 It took us about seven months with the first doc and nothing happened, so we changed doc and took secondmonth with new doc. goodluck lovely! I can't wait to hear when you preggers!!!!!!
Hello. Whilst I have not struggled to fall pregnant I have been through an ectopic pregnancy and a very stressful pregnancy with #2. I basically had a threatened miscarriage from the moment that stick had two lines! I was absolutely convinced I would lose the pregnancy as I had bleeding, cramping etc It was a difficult time and I couldn't wait to get passed the first trimester. But even then I worried because I was so stressed something else would go wrong! It is very easy for people to say "Just relax" or "don't let it consume" you but it is WAY easier said than done. I would suggest keeping yourself as busy as possible, focus on all the positives, speak to trusted friends/ family/ a therapist about your feelings. Plan something to look forward to - a romantic weekend away with your partner for example. Not only will it help take your mind off things but it will give you time to reconnect as a couple. Start a new hobby or project if possible to keep your mind occupied. Im not going to suggest you don't obsessively use pregnancy tests because we all know how impossible that is! haha :) But if you can resist till you "late" then do that. Really wishing you the best of luck in this journey ahead! xx